An Interview with a Dragon - Part XIII: Dr. Ryerson Receives a Lesson
VR: Yes, but you also said that dragon humor is supposed to teach people a lesson!
AD: Quite true. Quite true.
VR: SO WHAT THE HELL KIND OF LESSON WERE YOU JUST TRYING TO TEACH ME!??!
AD: Whoa, whoa, calm down. Look, Dr. Ryerson, you're a great human. But you tend to take dragons very seriously - maybe more seriously than you should.
VR: But what do you mean? Dragons are the most magnificent creatures in the universe. They are the most fascinating and most spiritually evolved - and I'm taking advantage of the contact I have with them.
AD: It's really great that you're interested in us, but maybe you should spend some time doing things like going to the park, or maybe finding a girlfriend. If you let dragons dominate your life by studying them all the time - without being interested in human affairs - this isn't good. It's almost as if you have been eaten by a dragon already, in a metaphorical sense, and your soul is boxed into your habituated way of life.
VR: Wow. - Wow. I've never been stripped down like that before. You read me like an open book. I have been thinking about this lately. Maybe sometimes I get too involved with studying dragons because it allows me to escape the uninteresting life that I would otherwise have to deal with. I know a lot about dragons, but when it comes to the human stuff, I'm not really sure where to begin.
AD: When was the last time you took a shower?
VR: Maybe a week ago.
AD: Perhaps we can start there.
VR: Are you trying to be funny again?
AD: No, I'm being serious. It's unhygienic not to shower.
VR: Dragons don't shower.
AD: Sure they do. What do you think all those sightings of the Loch Ness Monster all about? It's just people catching dragons in the buff while they bathe.
VR: Oh…
AD: Dragons don't have sweat glands and are by and large dainty creatures. And let's remember, you're not a dragon. You have sweat glands, and when you don't shower for a week, you smell. It's human nature.
VR: But so much time is wasted showering - I could be making great discoveries about dragons. I could be sharing these discoveries with my colleagues…
AD: Look, I don't want to have this discussion right now. I can't live your life for you, nor do I want to - that's your job, and should be looked upon as an honor - you're human and that's a great thing. All I can do is offer some pointers, and if you want to take dragons seriously, then you should seriously consider my advice. Do we have an agreement that you'll shower and get outside and meet other people?
VR: OK. I'll try to interact with people more often, and shower more than once a week.
AD: It's worth it, trust me. You'll thank me later for saying this someday.
VR: Well, I thank you now for doing this, once again. I hope that we should meet in the future.
AD: We will. Goodbye now. And think carefully about everything I said. But don't lose sleep over it, OK?
VR: Deal.
AD: And you better keep the fire-breathing stuff a secret [he winks, smiles, and disappears].
VR
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