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An Interview with a Dragon - Part XI: The Joke Continues

AD: Indeed. I have to do that because I can't risk this secret escaping.

VR: TRAP MY SOUL IN A JAR?!?!??! [beginning to back away slowly, holding the chair as if to fend off the dragon if he were to attack]

AD: Yes, trap your soul. You see, even in the afterlife this sacred knowledge is not safe with you. What if some clever New-Age dragonologist decides to channel your spirit to get the information? If you've been persistent enough to find a true dragon and have the cunning to have an interview with one, what would make me so naïve to think that you wouldn't find some way of coming back from the dead to tell about it? To tell the most heavily guarded secrets of all dragons?

VR: Look [struggling to remain calm] let's go back to square one. We were talking, everything was going fine. I asked you about dragon fire breathing, and you told me nothing. You said it was a trade secret that was not to be divulged to humans. Now, you're accusing me of denying that I remember you telling something that you didn't actually tell me, and you're threatening to eat me and lock my soul in a jar??? Look, the reason behind my entire work as a dragonologist is to inform people about the goodness of dragons, and to clear up misconceptions they have about dragons eating humans. You talk about not wanting to affect human-dragon relations in a negative way - but how do you think eating a [very highly] renowned and respected dragonologist will look to others? Not so good. And no less, for a crime that I did not even commit!

AD: A clever move Dr. Ryerson. Trying to turn it around on me. Don't forget - dragons invented human psychology. You're dealing with someone who has a bit more experience in it than you. Now then, where do you keep your silverware? [he begins searching the kitchen] And I'll need a napkin too. I would rather not make a mess when I eat you. Don't assume that I will enjoy this either. I assure you, this is one of the most unpleasant things I have had to do in a great while, but unfortunately I have to do it. If you have a mason jar, that will do just fine for the soul trapping. Usually when dragons trap people's souls, they go on EBay to buy a fancy urn or something else to that effect, but a mason jar will have to do for today.

VR: NOOOO!!! PLEASE!!! I'LL DO WHATEVER YOU WANT.

AD: I'm sorry Dr. Ryerson. It's too late for that now. You had your chance.

VR